Lights flashing,

World spinning,


Move your lips as fast as you can,

Until the only noise is your heart jumping out of your mouth!

And then, silence.


I sigh in relief,

Until a tidal wave of anxiety,

Bigger than any building I’ve ever seen takes me.


I jump,

Hoping that someone will catch me,

And convince me that the wave is merely a puddle,

Too shallow to even drown in,

And maybe in reality that’s all it is.


But right here and now it feels like a battle that’s gone on for eight years too long,

With millions of casualties.


And while I’ve survived and many have not,

The idea of peace seems like such a far-off dream that not even God can bring it to me.

Though He promises,

I sometimes cannot help but feel venom passing through my lips,



Yet even in these times of darkness I feel a sensation of comfort drift over me,

Maybe I’m crazy?

Perhaps I’m mad?

Hopefully it’s love,

Yes, let’s go with that,



About Rachel Lynn

Writer | Sister | Recovery Warrior | Singer | Fat | Feminist | Christian | Hashimoto's | Life is not easy but I cope through poetry and writing. This is where I share it; my hopes, dreams, struggles, and triumphs.
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